The Will of the Damned: Storms on the Sea
by Teresa Martin
Summary: The Clone Wars have come as Anakin and Amidala begin their marriage.
1. Default Chapter Title

"STORMS ON THE SEA" (PART II OF "The Will of the Damned") 

3 YEARS AFTER 'GLIMMERS OF DARKNESS' 

--------------- 

The doors to Darth Sideous' rooms opened. The Sith did not turn his face, but kept his back away from the entrant. 

Finally Sideous was ready to address him: "Yes, young Skywalker?" 

"Sir, we are coming upon Alderaan. I thought you'd like to know." 

"Yes, thank you," the genial man spun around and addressed Jedi Anakin Skywalker, "And I suppose this will be your last 'run' for me. I understand that the Jedi Council has asked you to return to the Temple." 

"It has, Chancellor," Anakin said. "With our victory against the Mandolorians in the Clone War . . ." 

"Achieved through your superior leadership skills." 

"Er, yes, thank you sir. With our victory, I have been assigned to a discernment team whose purpose is to determine how the Jedi may go best serve the Republic, as military leaders, or as civilians." 

"Yes," Palpatine replied thoutfully, "I would only say, remember that the time just after a war can be just a dangerous as the actual conflict." 

"Yes, sir." Anakin nodded. 

Palpatine looked at the Jedi with a smile, "And I sense that there is something else that the Council wishes to discuss with you?" 

Anakin returned the smile, "Yes, sir. I have requested permission to marry Princess Amidala. Their answer is ready." 

"I would never interefere with anything the Jedi would decide, but I hope that the Council is favorable. I have never been comfortable with their customs concerning celibacy and marriage. Who are they to decide who may marry and who may not?" 

Anakin frowned, and Palpatine realized he had pushed a little too far. Anakin was still loyal to the Council and the Jedi Code which authorized them to regulate marriage customs. "But of course, who am I to question. There are many mysteries in your religion." 

"Yes," Anakin answered relieved. 

"And I am pleased in your choice of a wife. Princess Amidala has been an invaluable member of my Cabinet this last year." 

"Thank you, sir. I also wanted to say what an honor it has been serving you, and the Republic, by defending it against the threat of the Mandolorians and the return of slavery. You know how I feel about slavery." 

"Yes, yes I do. And your testimonies and--I may say--charisma, had helped gain support for this war." 

"Rest assured, I will never forget the lessons you've taught me this past year." 

"Good. I should hope you would not forget. For I will rely on your using all that you know within the Jedi Order." 

"I shall, sir. Thank you sir." 

Palpatine smirked as he watched the young Jedi exit his chambers. 

***** 

"Cat got your tongue, Ani?" Bail Organa asked his Jedi friend. 

Anakin's friend and co-pilot during the war had met him for stim tea, before leaving for Alderaan to prepare for his wedding to Micaeli Nujakkoo, a Baroness. 

"Sorry, I'm a little distracted." 

Bail grinned, "I can't imagine why?" 

"Cut it out, Bail," Anakin grumbled, "I'm nervous enough." 

"Ok, ok. I hope you can make it to the wedding, and if not . . . I'll be sure to give Ami plenty of attention!" 

"Very funny," Anakin kicked him under the table, "I should warn you never to mess with me. I'll make you regret it!" Anakin smiled. "Yeah right, Jedi boy, you and what army?" "Bail, if I weren't a Jedi I'd tell you right now what you can do with your bravado!" 

"Lucky for me then that you are!" 

The comrades laughed and Anakin said he had to leave. They promised to see each other later. 

***** 

A trio of wind instruments played light, airy tunes in the Crystal Terrace of Organa Palace. Amidala was sitting with Prince Bail Organa's fiance, Micaeli. The music went well with the setting. Amidala was wearing a high-waisted pink dress with flowing chiffon and veils. Her companion was in royal blue, the skirt being fuller than the Queen's, her head-piece limited to some gold threaded throughout her braids. 

Both ladies were enjoying themselves. They had become good friends and had supported each other while worrying about their boyfriends fighting in the Clone War. 

Amidala was nervous. Anakin had promised her years ago that they would be married one day. It had been a joke for years among the two friends. The joke had turned serious as they matured and fell in love. Before Anakin left for the Clone War, Anakin had pledged his love for her and promised that they would be married when he returned. The only thing that could stop them now was the Council. But surely they would give permission, after all that Anakin had done for them. She couldn't wait to see him. 

Of course, it would be difficult to be have moments alone with him. The couple was very popular with the people. Amidala could do no wrong, according to the holo-news, and the hero of the Clone War received equal atention. They were the People's Royalty and emulated. It was very difficult for them to remain humble with such adoration thrown at them all the time. It was fun to be culture icons. Moreoever, Amidala's image was boosted by of her support of Chancellor Palpatine. Under his administation corruption had disappeared in the the Senate. There was no dissent and everything that the Chancellor proposed went through quickly. During the war, Amidala had travelled throughout Coruscant visiting those who had family killed. She had kept up morale on the homefront and her fashion statements helped the people keep a romantic image of the times in which they lived. She was only too happy to participate. 

Amidala's only shadows were cast by the Senator from her own world, Mon Mothma. A young woman, and quite uppity. She was always spouting out-dated Republic Documents, including the Republic's Constitiution, to oppose measures Palpatine proposed. She was always trying to thwart Palpatine's noble plans. 

Something that hurt Amidala truly was that her homeworld went with Mon Mothma. This had led to Amidala's resignation. Her people no longer thought as she did. 

Palpatine assured her that the Naboo would live to regret their ingratitude to her and his administration. 

Amidala's confort from her homeworld's betrayal was that Palpatine had accomplished what she had wished. They had a strong leader, one who never let misery last by covering it under noble rhetoric. 

Her final consolation was that the present policy against slavery, by permitting limited use of cloning, was working. It was a small evil, but the ends justified the means. Sometimes bad had to be done to create good. These clones kept full life forms from being exploited and living a life of misery. The Mandolorians had felt betrayed by the limited permission and had opened fire on Senator Luke Organa's transport thus precipitating the Clone War. Amidala hated war and would have peace at any cost, but then if the Chancellor willed war, it must be right. Palpatine was a good man and she trusted that he knew what he was doing. 

Crystal tea glasses tingled as the ladies continued sipping, watching the odd purple sunset peculiar to Alderaan. Then they saw Obi-Wan Kenobi's shuttle fly by. Micaeli smiled as the Queen put down her tea, picked up her skirts and fled without a word, excitement permeating every pore of her body. 

***** 

Anakin all but ran from the hangar, ignoring the holo-news reporters that swarmed about him--every move of his was widely reported lately. Without knowing why, he had become a celebrity. 

He barged into Amidala's quarters, caught her up in his arms, and swung her around and around, kissing her passionately. 

"I take it the Council gave a favorable answer?" Amidala asked, a little out of breath. 

"Yes! We can marry as soon as we wish!" Anakin shouted, deciding not to tell her that the original answer had been to wait until he was 25 years old. But Anakin, with the help of Obi-Wan, had talked the Council into dispensing with that condition. Obi-Wan's words were quite heated with the Council. Anakin was not shocked by his former master's actions. He remembered Obi-Wan's teaching passed from Qui-Gon Jinn: one could defy the Council if one felt that they were wrong. 

After a few hours, the Council, against the wishes of Master Yoda, gave in to Obi-Wan and granted unconditional permission for Anakin to marry. 

"So let's just bring Obi over here and get married right now!" Anakin exclaimed. 

"No way, Ani," Amidala replied, "we're having a public, royal wedding. I've been dreaming about this for years." "Oh, C'mon!" 

"Ani . . ." 

"Yes, dear." Anakin said in a resigned voice. "See, I've already developed the skills that ensure a successful marriage!" 

***** 

Bail Organa's bachelor party was fun. The boys were all letting loose, despite Chancellor Palpatine's presence. They were playing sabac and smoking cigars: a true testosterone fest, they said. Bail and Anakin were sitting with fellow pilots from the War, Li and Jokl. 

"This will probably be the only royal wedding we'll see for awhile," Bail commented, throwing down a card. 

"Don't be so sure," Anakin answered, picking a new card from the deck. 

Jokl, picked up the meaning, "You mean you and Princess Amidala?" 

Anakin grinned as Bail jumped up and slapped his friend on the back. "All right! I get a place of honor at the wedding. You have to let me, man!" 

"Sure." 

Jokl joked, "Yeah, I guess I couldn't be there, considering the sordid affair I had with Amidala a few years back." All went silent. "I was joking Ani!" Jokl insisted. 

Anakin cringed. "I don't share your sense of humor, Jokl." 

"Sorry. Hey, we've all know that Amidala always had that Virgin Queen thing going for her, and that she wouldn't . . ." 

"Shut up!" Anakin yelled. "You are so clueless!" Anakin was surprised at himself for his outburst. He took a deep breath, "Sorry, Jokl," he muttered. "I'm a little on edge is all." 

"No problem, buddy," Jokl replied sheepishly, "I'm sorry, too." Li spoke up, "I'm also sorry." Questioning eyes looked his way. "I was feeling left out," he explained. Everyone laughed shakily. 

Bail watched the scene in silence. He had never seen his friend say anything in anger. His Jedi training had controlled it. But then Anakin had never been engaged before. Getting married could be very stressful. 

Bail looked over Anakin's shoulder and saw the Chancellor. A feeling like horror washed over him: The Chancellor was smiling at Anakin. 

***** 

The holo reporters swamped Amidala as she entered Bail Organa's yacht. Bail had told her it was at her disposal. She took him up on his offer and decided to take a short vacation. She wanted Anakin to join her, but both feared how that would look. A solution was offered by Micaeli's sister, Elir, who promised to go with them as 'chaperone.' Amidala did not like Elir. She was a social climber who always sought photo-ops with the popular Princess. But this time Amidala tolerated her, even posed for a photo with her. Elir was certain to leave her and Anakin alone once they entered the yacht. 

***** "Not bad," Anakin commented, kicking off his boots and reclining on a white couch with several pillows. His Jedi uniform looked rather goofy with his white feet poking out from the legs. Anakin made the image worse by taking down his pony-tail, worn like his hero, Qui-Gon Jinn. 

"Indeed!" Elir agreed already sampling the drink bar and the other niceties. 

"Royalty lives in style, right Ami?" Anakin called out to Amidala as she entered the room. 

"I never had something this nice for mere vacations," she replied, sitting next to her fiance, and leaning against him. He pulled her down beside him. 

"Just go on, don't mind me," Elir said flippantly, biting into another piece of chocolate. 

"There are other rooms on the yacht you know," Anakin said a little annoyed. 

"Excuse me! I'll take a holo-vid into Bail's room." 

When she was gone, Amidala whispered to Anakin, "Don't be too hard on her, Ani. She annoys me too, but there are many things we have to put up with." 

Anakin nodded, stroking her hair. Amidala was worried about something. 

"I just want to sleep," she mumbled, "It's been a rough morning." 

"What happened?" 

"I told Chancellor Palpatine that I would be retiring for good after our wedding." 

"What?" Anakin sat up, pulling Amdiala into a sitting postiion with him. He peered into her face, "Ami, you don't have to." 

"I want to," she returned his earnest gaze. "Ani, I've been in the political arena for nearly 15 years. I've accomplished all that I want. And now, as your wife, as a Jedi's wife," she corrected herself, "I want to be able to build our marriage. And I'm not just marrying you, I'm also marrying the Jedi Order." 

Anakin agreed with her, but he was glad she came to the realization herself. 

Amidala went on, "If I didn't want or accept that, we could have just shacked up secretly and went about our business, without marriage." 

"Ami!" Anakin exclaimed, shocked. 

"Don't play innocent with me! I know there are many Jedi who do just that." 

"But it's really bad when they do, Ami. It's a terrible hypocrisy!" 

"Yes," Amidala replied, "but it does happen, scandalous though it is. You chose not to be that kind of Jedi. The Jedi you are is a part of the man I fell in love with. Your family will be my family." 

Then, without warning, Amidala's vision blurred. 

Anakin took her head between his hands, worried. "I'm all right," Amidala muttered, "it's just stress." 

Anakin reached down and rubbed her temples, "Here, let me try this." He used a Jedi calming technique on her. She immediately began to drift off. "Don't worry, Angel," he told her in a low voice, "you've made a decision according to your conscience, a well-formed conscience. I stand by your decision." 

A small, sleepy smile, "Angel? It's been a while since you've called me that." 

"The last time I tried, you complained that it made you gag." 

"There are times when I don't mind it," Amidala laughed softly and leaned against Anakin's chest, almost unconscious. 

"Just rest," he whispered, tilting her face up and kissing her goodnight. "Rest." 

***** 

Thunder awoke Amidala. She bolted upright. 

"Just a storm," Anakin soothed from a sofa across from her. 

"A storm?" Amidala repeated in dismay, "I always get sea-sick." 

"Let's go up on deck, then." 

"Out there?" 

Anakin took her hand, "Just up to the bridge. I'll show you something that will help." 

On the bridge Anakin stood behind Amidala, put his hands on her head, and forced her vision out the view-port. 

"Can you see the horizon?" he asked. 

"Yes." 

"Good. Just keep your eyes on it. That's the way to survive a storm at sea." 

Amidala turned around to face him. "Find the horizon?" 

"Yes." Anakin twisted her back into the original position. "Now stay put!" She laughed. He continued, "Bail told me about this. He has some buddies who get as sick as dogs on the sea." 

"But you don't?" Amidala asked. 

"I'm a Jedi." Anakin replied flippantly. 

"Ooooohh!" she exclaimed in mock reverance. 

"Hey, watch it, or I won't help you out." 

Amidala giggled, "Yes, sir!" 

Anakin smiled and spoke into her ear, "Watch the horizon, Ami." 

"I am." ***** 

Obi-Wan waited patiently in the tap-cafe. Amidala and Anakin wanted to see him before he left on the mission on which Jedi Anabelle Jade and her Jedi husband, Augus Jade, would accompany him. The tap-cafe was swarming with customers. In the sea of people, Obi-Wan caught sight of two familiar figures. 

"Amidala! Anakin!" Obi Wan greeted his friends. "I hope you don't mind, I've invited Augus to dine with us. He'll be here soon." 

"Good," Anakin said as the couple sat down. After they had ordered, Obi-Wan asked, "How are the wedding plans going?" 

"Fine," Amidala answered. "Anabelle and I went shopping this afternoon, looking for the dress." 

"And?" 

"We decided to have it made instead." 

"Oh." 

Jedi Augus came up. "I heard my wife's name." 

"Yes," Anakin answered, "we were speaking of Ana--" 

And the crash thundered around them. 

***** 

Amidala awoke, her head cradled on a lap. She tried to sit up, and was gently pushed down. 

"Lie still," Anakin's voice whispered. 

"What happened?" her voice sounded far away. 

"The building collapsed. There was an explosion." 

Amidala tried to sit up, but Anakin again made her lay down. 

She whispered, frightened, "Obi-Wan?" 

"I'm here, Ami," Amidala recognized Obi-Wan's voice, "and Augus too. We were lucky." 

Amidala was able to open her eyes and saw . . . nothing else. She shuddered. "Were we the only ones to survive?" 

"I don't know," Anakin told her. 

Amidala closed her eyes and buried her head in her fiance's lap. 

***** 

Her tongue felt like rubber, her throat was raspy and she was dizzy. It had been four days since the explosion, a long time to go without food and water. The Jedi were trying their best to sustain their strength and Amidala's, but it was becoming a losing battle. Amidala had begun to give up hope for rescue, and felt very odd about the peace that came with the resignation. She sensed strongly that it was merely the end of one life, and moving on to another. Most importantly, she was going with those whom she loved. 

"A trance." 

"What?" Amidala shook herself into awareness. 

"A Jedi hibernation trance," Augus repeated, "I think it could keep us alive until we're rescued." 

"And if we're not rescued?" 

Augus shrugged in answer. 

"At least it's a nice way to drift off," Obi-Wan remarked. Anakin was silent in horror. How could it all end just as they were so happy? He looked around at the serene faces of his companions. Were they out of their minds? He was not ready to give up on life, not yet. He wanted it on his terms, not . . . 

*Death can come at any time, my friend* Obi-Wan said to him. 

Anakin saw Amidala gazing at him, and was a little ashamed. He was supposed to be a Jedi. He was not acting very 'at peace.' 

Naturally, Amidala would be first, and then the Jedi would put themselves into a trance. 

"Just a minute," Anakin protested, and turned to Amidala. "If this is the end or whatever . . . I've always said I was going to marry you. I'm not giving up on that. Let's do it now." 

"Get married? Now?" 

"We have a Jedi to officiate, and a witness in Augus." Anakin started to say more, but his voice choked. 

Amidala's eyes filled with tears. "Ok, let's do it!" 

***** 

"Let's do it?" Amidala asked incredulously. "That's how they ended it?" She came out of the small kitchen in their rooms at the Jedi Temple. 

"I suppose they didn't have time to hire a prize-winning author," her husband replied. "Remember, this came out just a month after our rescue." 

Amidala shook her head, "And it's a best-seller?" 

"We're just star material," Anakin commented wickedly. "And we are rather romantic." 

Amidala sniffed, "Romantic? I don't think so. If it hadn't really happened I would have thought this was the dumbest love story I've ever read!" 

Amidala laughed and plopped onto their bed, brushing Anakin's hair back, "And it seems you got your wish after all--a quiet, quick wedding." 

"I usually get what I want!" Anakin answered, grinning, as he pulled his wife into an embrace. 

***** 

Anabelle Jade and Obi-Wan stood before Chancellor Palpatine in his quarters, looking over the report. 

"The Mandolorians have claimed responsibility for the explosion," Palpatine explained, "in revenge for their defeat. We will not let this challenge go unanswered." He paused and said meaningfully, "I do not believe they want it to go unanswered." 

Anabelle caught the cue from her master. "But, with all due respect Chancellor, are they not an innocent people, too weak to fight another war?" 

"Indeed," Palpatine replied. "Which is why I am disturbed by their boldness in this attack." 

Obi-Wan asked quietly, "Are you saying, Chancellor, that it is possible the Mandolorians have made a powerful alliance which could threaten the Republic?" 

"That would make their provocation of war more logical," Anabelle remarked. 

Obi-Wan muttered, "I have a bad feeling about this." 

"As do I," Palpatine replied. "Jedi Kenobi, I would have you relay this information to the Jedi Council and tell them that I am sending Anabelle and her husband to visit Mandalor. They are being sent on an intelligence gathering operation." 

"As you wish, sir." 

to be continued . . . . 


	2. Default Chapter Title

"STORMS ON THE SEA" part two 

Amidala walked through the halls of the Jedi Temple. She was to meet Obi-Wan for stim- tea, like they used to when she was single. On her way, she passed many classes of Jedi Apprentices, all of whom nodded at her and politely called her 'Mrs. Skywalker.' When she passed a class of toddlers, many ran over to her, and jumped around, yelling things out. The Padawan teacher looked exasperated--not very disciplined, these young ones. But Amidala laughed, and told the children that they had to go back with their teacher. 

Amidala smiled as she continued down the hall, filled with anticipation. In about 6 months, she and Anakin were expecting their first child. Both of them loved children and could hardly wait. She finally reached the small cafe. Upon entering, Amidala did her best to hide her amusement. The Jedi tried to make the cafe normal, but Amidala had never seen a stim-tea house almost entirely quiet, with sober customers, many of whom were meditating. 

*Definately not like Beru's place* Amidala thought with a pang. She had only known Beru for a few months, but she had liked her. When Beru and Owen left forever to hide from the Sith, Amidala felt that she had lost a good friend. Obi-Wan looked up and smiled as Amidala sat down across from him. 

"You look happy." 

"I haven't been this excited in years! There's something energetic about being around so many young people, ready to learn." 

Obi-Wan nodded. He too had enjoyed teaching the young apprentices. He commented, "And you will soon take your place among the teachers after you complete your training." 

Amidala nodded happily. She had already been serving as a curriculum advisor for the apprentices. Recently the Jedi Council had agreed to admit her among the instructors. Her status as a Jedi wife made that feasible. Many Jedi who married outside the order made similar arrangements for their spouses. Amidala could not help but notice how few of them there were. 

"Why don't more Jedi marry?" Amidala asked her friend. 

"I'm not sure," Obi-Wan's clear eyes were momentarily pensive, "I know for myself that it was never really a question." 

"You never thought about marriage?" 

"No, Obi-Wan answered. "I wanted to be a Jedi and to truly be at the disposal of the order and the people, one must be single. The Code won't explicitly forbid marrying, yet one cannot serve on the Council while being married." 

Amidala was silent under this. A sacrifice Anakin had made for her. 

Obi-Wan went on, "And though I certainly admire, and am frequently attracted to, various women--including you at one time if you remember. . ." 

Amidala blushed. 

" . . . But marriage? No. With Anakin, it was different. He knew from the moment he met you that you would be his wife. He is so force senstitive that it was a foregone conclusion. The question with you two was when, not if." Obi-Wan took a sip of tea. "And now he has you, a daughter on the way, and you willing to be his partner in the Jedi work. It seems like this all was tailor made for you." 

"Yes. We have been lucky," Amidala commented. "How will I continue with my studies under Anakin?" 

"Most likely you will accompany him off-world on his missions and study as you go along, as Padawans do," Obi-Wan explained. 

She laughed, "So will I have to call him Master?" 

"Ami, that's a place I don't want to go!" Both laughed. 

Amidala then said more soberly, "And it would mean that we would not have to be separated when Ani's on a mission." 

"Exactly," Obi-Wan nodded. 

Amidala was about to ask another question when her face froze. 

"What is it?" Obi-Wan asked, alarmed. He sensed fear and pain. "Nothing." Amidala breathed. 

"The child?" 

Rising panic was in Amidala's voice, "Obi-Wan, get me to the med-center, quickly!" 

***** 

Anakin was sitting in the hallway of the med-center, his head in his hands. The words of the droid seemed far away. "Common in first pregnancies, surgery needed . . . may never conceive again . . ." 

Before he knew what he was doing, Anakin reached out with the Force and crushed the droid into a pile of scraps. 

***** 

"Report." 

Augus briefed Chancellor Palpatine, "The evidence would suggest that the attack on the shopping areas was precipitated by a fringe terrorist group. There is no evidence that it was a planned act of war." 

"Really?" Palpatine asked curiously. 

Anabelle looked at her husband and thought contemptuously, *You fool, you've just signed your own death warrent.* 

"But there is somebody arming the Mandolorians," Augus continued. "We must . . ." "You will probe no further," Palpatine cut him off, "and you will speak of this to nobody." Augus' eyes widened, a little alarmed at Palpatine's tone. 

*My Master is talking to Augus like he talks to me* Anabelle thought. 

"It is a matter of security," Palpatine said more gently, "we need to discuss this in committee. You and Anabelle are to return to Coruscant." 

The Jedi bowed in respect to the hologram before it disappeared. 

***** Anakin was called to Master Depa Belluba's chamber. Matter-of-factly she informed him that another war may break out against the Mandolorians. To stop this, or determine the Republic's course of action, Anakin was sent to attend a conference on Naboo. Amidala would accompany him. 

"As my apprentice?" Anakin asked. 

"Yes. And to recover from her miscarriage," the master eyed Anakin, observing. "You both need to recover. I order you to arrive in Naboo a week early for a vacation." 

***** 

The lights of Theed slightly illuminated the path as Anakin and Amidala walked along the river on the cobblestone streets, hand in hand. Amidala's hair was down, pulled back from her face with a modest ribbon. The rest of her hair was frizzy and curly, falling down her back, over her navy blue gown and pink transparent cape. Anakin's hair was cut short now and he was not in Jedi clothing. It was becomming more popular among the Jedi to dress like everyone else since the Jedi had come under attack for their exclusivity. Chancellor Palpatine had congratulated the Jedi on their recent concessions in that matter. Amidala wore a diamond bracelet that Anakin had given her for her birthday. Her 27th. 

"I feel about twice that age," she sighed to Anakin. 

"You don't look it," he grinned. 

"Appearances can be deceiving," she said wrily. The operation had drained her, Anakin's brow puckered. He was worried about her. She went on, "but I am glad that the occasion was celebrated with little fanfare." 

"Except for me." 

"You had the honor." She smiled, her face flushed. 

"It's good to see you smile. You haven't a lot lately." 

"With good cause." 

They had stopped and were sitting on the stone wall by the river. Moonlight shimmered over the lapping water. 

Amidala leaned over and kissed him. Anakin held her closely, thinking how much he loved her, his family. Then anger came over him. His grip became tighter on her, but Amidala knew it was not out of passion. 

"What's wrong?" she asked. 

"Can you really ask that?" Anakin stood up, not looking at her. 

"Anakin? 

He whirled around, "It seems that nothing ever seems to go right with us. There are many people who don't give a rat's behind whether they have kids. We want some, and this happens." A pause, then very low. "I can't remember a time when I wasn't losing someone I love." 

Amidala answered wearily, "Ani, life is suffering. As a Jedi you should know that!" 

"But that doesn't mean I have to like it." 

"Nobody does, but you can't avoid suffering." 

"Tell me about it!" He snapped. 

Amidala's eyes began turning to steel, "You have to accept it, Ani. " 

Anakin looked down at his wife, "I'm a little sick of being told to accept everything, become a victim of everyone else's bad decisions." 

"Victim? Never!" Amidala responded firmly. "We suffer, but are not victims. We fight back. It's a moral obligation to defend oneself." 

Silence. Amidala's words did not soothe him, but almost made him more angry. He was surprised to find that he was tempted to kick down the wall. 

He counted to ten: "We shouldn't have named the baby yet," he commented softly. "Then it would be more . . ." 

"Impersonal?" Amidala asked. 

"Yes. We gave her my mother's name . . ." 

"And now losing her reminds you of your mother's violent death on Tatooine?" 

Anakin cringed. "You always have to be so blunt." 

"I don't like to be," Amidala replied. "But I don't wish to hide unpleasantness behind pretty words. The greatest of evils use that tactic. If what I said is what you are feeling and thinking, Ani, call it by it's name!" 

She was crying, the rings seemed more pronounced around her eyes. Anakin felt ashamed of himself. Amidala was suffering too, more so since she had the physical as well as the psycological pain. He was being selfish, only thinking of himself. Lately, he hardly knew himself. 

He embraced her. "I'm sorry. If I could have my one wish, it would be to make all pain go away, whatever the cost, whatever the sacrifice, and bring order and safety to this crazy galaxy." 

Amidala nodded against his shoulder, "I hate war too. And I fear that this one will be far worse than the last." 

Anakin looked down at his wife in surprise. "I sense that too. Are you sure you're not Force-sensitive?" 

Amidala laughed, "Yes. But let me tell you a secret: us 'normal' people have blessings from the Force too, in many ways better than the Jedi, for we see it in a more simple way. We see the Force in the ordinary things." 

Anakin smiled down at her, "My wise Angel." 

She playfully punched his arm, "I told you not to call me that!" 

"No, you said sometimes you didn't mind! Will you give a guy a break?" 

She laughed and kissed him playfully, but felt . . . She pulled back, standing on her tip-toes to smooth his hair and asked, "What else?" 

Anakin looked down, trying to avoid her gaze. 

"Tell me," she gently urged. 

He got the courage to meet her gaze and speak his greatest fear to her, "There is one loss from which I don't think I could ever recover." He placed his hands on her shoulders, tight. "Ami, sometimes I think of losing you, and it nearly kills me." 

Amidala met his worried gaze, "Well get over it, Ani. You can lose anyone, at any time." 

He shook his head. 

"At any time," she repeated. "And I could lose you." 

"Never," he said passionately. 

"What? Jedi don't die?" she asked a little sarcastically. 

Anakin replied, "If I did, I'd come back to you . . ." 

Something in his gaze frightened her. "Ani," she asked soflty, "what would you do if you lost me?" 

A silence. 

"Let's forget it," Anakin dodged the question. "This is dark talk." 

"Yes," she said wearily, giving up . . . for now. "And I am tired." 

They walked back to the hotel. Once in their room, Anakin scooped her up in his arms, and carried her to bed where he undressed her like she was a child. He tucked her in before slipping in beside her, and they fell asleep in peace. 

***** 

That night Anakin woke up with a start. 

"What is it?" Amidala asked, sitting up beside him. 

"A dream. I was somewhere else. We were married, but I wasn't a Jedi. And that was a good thing because I should not have been trained. Since that was good, I'm now in the bad world, where I am a Jedi . . ." 

A chill went through Amidala. 

"Ani, it was just a dream." 

"And in this world, I'll lose you," he continued as if he didn't hear her, "And I won't care! I won't care because I won't want you anymore." 

"Ani, you'll make yourself sick with this. You're just upset, our earlier conversation . . ." 

Anakin shook his head, "It was so real." "Dreams usually seem so." He whispered, "I won't want you anymore . . ." He buried his head in his hands and shook. Amidala touched his hand, it was ice. 

She touched his face. "There's nothing to be afraid of!" Shook him a little, "Ani, I mean it! Stop letting it get to you." 

She hugged him, gave him soothing words. He quaked in her arms and lay down, his head on her chest. She smoothed his hair, as though he were a child. 

He kept mumbling, "I won't want you anymore." 

And she kept replying, "It was just a dream." 

***** 

The leaders of many worlds met facing each other in a large circle. King Ratiche of Naboo read aloud the report from the Jedi Ambassadors. There was ample evidence that the Mandolorians were arming. Couple this with the attack, for which they had taken full responsibility, Palpatine recommended that a military action to disarm the Mandolorians was a neccessity. 

After much debate and a unanimous vote, the conference agreed to authorize their senators to vote for a declaration of war. 

The conference ended the session by observing a moment of silence in memory of Jedi Augus Jade. 

***** 

There was a buzz in Coruscant. 

The Academy students were all training at their best, and there were many patriotic speeches broadcast over the holo-news. If the Republic was going to fight against slavery, then they would have the full support of the citizens. Anakin and his friend Bail were reunited. The latter would again take up his command with General Obi-Wan Kenobi, and Anakin, as before, would serve as a captain in the Fleet. 

In this rank, Anakin spent days on end testing his men in simulations and flight exercises. Seeing them perform to their utmost potential, and experiencing the indefinable family bond that exists among squadrons, Anakin felt an exhileration, an adrenaline rush that he hadn't felt since he lost his child. 

He was happy. 

***** 

Amidala too was happy. She was teaching classes to the Jedi Apprentices, under the supervision of Anabelle Jade. Anabelle was recovering from her husband's death, and thereby wearing the black robes of mourning. Her pain was compounded when she discovered she was having a child. When Anabelle confessed this to Amidala, she seemed afraid. 

"Please don't distress yourself," Amidala pleaded kindly, "children are a blessing. You have always been strong. I'm sure the baby will be safely delivered." 

Anabelle nodded, not telling Amidala the real reason for her fear. 

***** 

Anabelle knelt before her Master. 

"I am ordering you to active action with Anakin Skywalker," Palpatine instructed her. "I want you by his side at every moment. I won't tell you details yet, but I have something planned for the battle . . . " he stopped and angrily accused, "You are not listening, my young apprentice!" 

"Forgive me, Master," Anabelle mumbled. 

"Speak up! I can't hear you." Venom was in his voice. Anabelle felt horror washing over her. 

She gathered her courage and said quickly, "Master, it seems, that despite my efforts to the contrary, I have conceived a child." 

Silence. "What are we going to do with you now?" Palpatine said slowly after a minute. The voice was deceptively gentle and sounded like broken glass. 

Then Anabelle truly knew what fear was. 

***** 

Obi-Wan, Anakin, and Amidala went to Bail and Micaeli's for a night of cards and fun. 

Micaeli and Amidala broke off from the men for some stim-tea and 'girl talk.' "Like the old times, when we were younger, a little dumber," Micaeli laughed. 

Amidala answered, "I also feel a sense of having done all this before, in the first war." 

"Yes, but this time it's different. The Mandolorians are arming, but they are not as strong as they once were," Micaeli filled her friend's cup with stim-tea. 

Amidala shook her head, "Ani doesn't think so." 

"Ani isn't the only spokeman for the Almighty Force!" 

Amidala replied low, "No, but . . ." 

"Ami, I want you to listen carefully to me," Micaeli interrupted softly. "Don't start being negative. It will eat at you and make you weak and bitter." 

Amidala nodded. For a minute they listened to the men laughing and talking. 

"They seem almost happy that there's another war," Amidala commented sadly. 

"I don't think that's it, nobody likes war," Micaeli sighed and took a sip from her own cup. "But sometimes we feel relief during such conflicts because, for a brief moment in time, we fight an enemy we can see." 

Amidala looked at Micaeli curiously. 

She explained, "In our everyday lives we all feel an enemy--be it pain, the Dark Side, heartbreak, financial troubles, fear of slavery returning. But there's nothing we can *do* about it. So we all live day to day a little insecure and neurotic. But when we have a common, visable enemy, one that we can strike and kill with our own hands . . . Well, then there's a little bit of order in our world." 

"Paid with the price of war?" Amidala asked. 

Micaeli shrugged, "That's the cruel part, because this happiness we feel in war is an illusion. War and injustice--injustice always happens in war--is far worse than the monotony of life's little miseries. But again and again, we fall for the trap, because we prefer the illusion. It feels better." 

"Feels better." Amidala nodded, "That would explain how . . ." 

"How?" Micaeli asked. 

"Anakin and I have been a lot happier since war was declared. Our love life, too, has improved," she looked down, a little embarrassed. "But we shouldn't need a war to solve our problems." 

"We don't," Micaeli embraced her friend. "If we remember that, no matter what the outcome, we will win this war." 

***** 

The night before he left, Anakin and Amidala held each other intimately, renewing their love, their marriage covenant . . . swearing themselves to each other forever. 

***** 

"Anabelle!" Anakin exclaimed as he saw his friend and comrade sitting in the briefing room. "What are you doing here?" 

"I was assigned to strategy and intelligence," she answered. 

Anakin noticed something wrong with Anabelle. She was pale, haggard. 

"Anabelle," he looked at her, worried, "you are looking after the child aren't you?" 

"Yes. We're fine." Anabelle smiled at him. "Thank you for your concern." 

Anakin patted her shoulder in encouragement, and sat down. The lights in the room went dim as the briefing began. 

But Anabelle was not concentrating on the up-coming battle. She was pre-occupied with something she saw in Anakin's face, his concern and . . . 

Of course! The answer came with amazing clarity. Why hadn't she thought of it before? 

Not in war would her Master defeat Anakin, and not as a comrade and Jedi would she help turn him. 

Anabelle smiled in joy and relief. 

She had found the way to restore her Master's favor. 

***** 

"Yes, yes," Palpatine mused, a smile playing at the corners of his mouth. He looked down at Anabelle, waving a hand, "I give you permission to proceed with the proposed course of action, so long as . . ." 

Anabelle looked up when Palpatine hesitated. "Yes, Master?" 

He pointed a finger, "No harm is done to the child. Is that understood?" 

"Yes, Master." 

"Do not fail me in this," Palpatine warned, "I have plans for Mara." 

"Mara?" Anabelle asked. 

"Yes, that's the name I've given the child." 

Anabelle bowed her head, "As you wish, Master." 

Palpatine dismissed his apprentice and smiled. 

Everything was going as he had foreseen. 

***** 

An hour before they left for the battle, Obi-Wan, Bail and Anakin met for breakfast. They sucked down caff like it was water. 

"Like we need anything to pump us up!" Bail exclaimed. 

Anakin laughed, but Obi-Wan was pensive, "I still find it ironic." 

"That we are fighting another battle on Naboo?" Anakin asked. 

Obi-Wan nodded. The battle of Naboo was a painful memory. 

Bail mused, "Why is it the peaceful planets that are the first targets?" 

"Because by their pacifism, they leave themsleves vulnerable," Anakin answered. 

Bail complained, "And then it's up to us to go and intervene--protect the innocent and ensure peace for the galaxy!" 

"Right you are Bail," Anakin replied cheerfully, "And I propase a toast . . ." 

"With caff?" Bail asked. 

Anakin ignored him, "To the best friends a man can have, and to lasting peace and order in our galaxy." 

"I'll drink to that," Obi-Wan said. 

A voice over the intercom announced that it was time to leave. Anakin shook Bail's hand, then turned to Obi-Wan. He gave him a friendly salute and said, "See you at the palace, Master!" 

Obi-Wan returned the salute and smiled, "May the Force be with you, my Padawan!" 

And for the last time the three men parted as friends. 

***** 

It was hell. Explosions burst all around Anakin, and it seemed that the Mandolorian forces were endless--clones no doubt. Yet Anakin's pilots expertly flew through the mass of fire and explosions to beat back the enemy. 

The elation that comes with battle coursed through Anakin, when . . . The thought hit him: The ground assault. They were losing ground . . . and Obi-Wan . . . he was down. 

*NOOOOOOO* he heard in his mind, but it wasn't his voice. It was his master's, the cry Obi-Wan gave when he saw Qui-Gon cut down. Anakin's eyes began to blur as rage began to consume him. 

*No indeed, Master* He would not accept it. Not this time. Good people lost too often. His mother, his baby, his master. Sick of the pain. 

*Not this time.* 

Anakin began to stretch out with the Force and for an instant he remembered lessons from Master Yoda warning him about using too much of the Force. 

*But it's for a good purpose* Anakin spoke to Yoda, as though the master was there with him. 

*No, Ani. No turning back now* he said to himself. Anakin summoned more Force power than he had ever dared. 

It happened. 

The commander of the of the Mandolorian ground assault was under Anakin's control. The enemy's mind scrambled. Anakin responded by using more energy to allow that confusion to spread . . . and spread. The Mandolorian forces fell out in choas. 

*And it is so easy!* No sooner had that thought entered Anakin's head than he ordered his men to swoop in and obliterate as many of the Mandolorians as possible. 

***** 

No moonlight shimmered over the water as Anakin knelt on the banks where he and Amidala had shared their first kiss. No moon would ever be seen on Naboo again. 

Anakin had his victory. He destroyed those who hurt his loved ones, and avenged Obi-Wan's death. But at what cost? The fire-power Anakin ordered concentrated on Naboo had destroyed the planet's ecosystem. Naboo was doomed to a quick death. 

Anakin shuddered as he thought how he would have to explain that to his wife. He shook his head. *No.* 

He could not be honest and tell her that he had inadvertently destroyed the planet she loved. She had had enough pain in her life. She would not be reminded of Naboo everytime she looked at her husband. 

The old Anakin would have told her the truth, but not the strong one, the one who was no longer a victim. 

Perhaps he could find a way to reverse the process. Anakin returned to Theed and tried to gather the Jedi present to summon power to undo the damage to the planet. But Master Yoda, arriving after the battle with other members of the Council, forbade him, insisting that using that much of the Force would bring them too close to the Dark Side. 

Mace Windu sensed Anakin's rage and calmly addressed him, "You did a great deal of harm. You cannot cover it up, Jedi Skywalker, you must face the consequences." Anakin's head bowed, but not in shame or respect for his elders. Mace Windu continued, "You will return to Coruscant where we will address the matter at the Temple." 

Anakin then realized how much he must have had violated the Code. 

*But I stopped the Mandolorians. Good was accomplished.* Yoda rebuked him, "So your own council you keep on your actions?" 

"No, Master." Anakin answered. 

It was the first lie he had told in his life. 

***** 

Later Anakin was waiting for the shuttle which contained Chancellor Palpatine. He was unsettled by the scene with Yoda and Mace Windu. They had given him a strong rebuke. It almost hurt, but then Anakin Skywalker no longer accepted pain. 

He thought about the Jedi Council. Why were they so arrogant as to order him around? Who was it for they to tell him not to use too much of the Force? Did they know his thoughts, his conscience? 

Indeed, he had followed the rules all his life and all it brought him and the galaxy was pain. Anakin thought of his hero, Qui-Gon Jinn. He was right after all. The Force was about following one's heart over the Council. *I will do what I must* He felt warmth and insight. Perhaps Qui-Gon had seen the future when he said that to Obi-Wan so long ago. Maybe the Will of the Force was to collapse all hierarchy in the Jedi Order and make every Jedi follow a code each created for themselves. No longer one code for all! 

Yes, Qui-Gon--Anakin--was seeing the future. The demise of the Council. It was coming. It was the Will of the Force. He was certain and he did not hear Anabelle Jade come up to kneel beside him. 

"I feel the same way," she said gently. 

There was no need to ask Anabelle what she meant. Anakin replied, "Let's see what we can do then. Will you help me save Naboo?" 

Anabelle placed her hand on his shoulder and shook her head, "No. That's not what we need to do now." 

"But we could try?" 

Then Anakin felt a strange energy enter him, and he knew it. Now was not the time, not yet. He tingled all over. Was he touching the Dark Side? He shook off the thought. 

Anakin looked towards Anabelle and saw her green eyes fixed on him. He felt a little uneasy, but that feeling he also ignored for she was on his side. That was all that mattered now. 

"Come," Anabelle invited, "Chancellor Palpatine is waiting for us on his shuttle. We're going home." 

"Yes," Anakin answered, almost absently, "back to Coruscant. I will return, as Master Windu ordered, but not in the way the Council expects it." 

***** 

Anakin was on the shuttle, Chancellor Paplatine and Anabelle Jade beside him. He looked down at the towering buidings of Coruscant. The victory had been almost complete, though intelligence was saying that the Mandolorians were planning a counter-assault. But that didn't matter to Anakin. His eyes were fixed on the crowds assembled to meet him. They were celebrating his deeds. The crowd was there because of him and what he had accomplsihed by following--the Force?--his feelings. 

He barely remembered that Amidala would be among the throngs. 

"Nothing beats this, does it?" Palpatine asked, breaking the silence. 

Anakin looked again at the cheering crowds and felt their energy bounce off him. It was intoxicating. He did not answer the Chancellor. 

He did not need to. 

Anakin looked behind him and saw Anabelle smiling at him. She mouthed the word "Victory." Anakin returned her smile, happy that she was his ally. 

*Qui-Gon would be proud of us* he thought. 

He walked down the ramp and saw her. Amidala. His angel. A grin came over his face. 

The holo-cameras were ready when she ran up to him and gave him a welcome-home kiss. Anakin returned the embrace, but barely felt her lips on his. The emotions from the crowd were too overwhelming. 

Anakin also sensed Palpatine and Anabelle. The latter was sending energy into him, which he willingly received. He let his emotions flow back to her, even as he held his wife, and then to Palpatine. Something powerful was coming into his being. 

He liked it. 


End file.
